Lately I’ve been considering a departure from the Men’s Rights Movement after a falling out with female members of my family over my posting to Facebook the lyrics of a song titled “The Hatred of Women,” by YouTube user LaudanumByron (I cannot determine his real name). To the title I added the parenthetical phrase “(For Men Like Me).” When said female family members asked me if I was implying that women hated me specifically (or I might be projecting hatred onto them) I gave them the silent treatment. And yes, I do mean my blood family, my family of origin, the one I’m stuck with no matter what my opinions on various issues may be at any given moment.
The theme of the song is “Women hate me.” One of the MRM’s key websites, A Voice for Men dot com, as I have understood it to be, is not about hating women, but rather about teaching men how best to survive in the political, economic, legal & social climate of today’s Western world. Its radio arm, A Voice for Men Radio, hosted at BlogTalkRadio.com, currently is hosted by one man & 2 women: John the Other, Typhon Blue & Girl Writes What. John has stated before that there is a difference between women & feminism: women are a biological demographic, while feminism is an ideology that fosters misandry (hatred toward men). Yet one of the songs that is played during music breaks is the song in question, “The Hatred of Women.” Women! The biological demographic! So where does that leave women who, like TB & GWW, are fed up with feminism & want to see Western societies treat their men as more than mere disposable utilities? Those 2 gals don’t hate the singer, do they?
Now let’s analyse the lyrics. Let’s start with the 1st verse:
I never heard my Grandpa speak
A simple man, mild & meek
He went to work, he went to sleep
My Grandma told us that he was weak
So why or how exactly was Grandpa weak? And if he was so weak, then how did he & Grandma manage to get together to create the singer’s mother or father? However they did, their relationship must not have been a healthy one, much less a happy one.
Now let’s fast forward to another verse or 2:
Men have no doubt just what they’re for
We die at work, we die in war
Die at sea as the lifeboats float ashore
Women & children, all aboard
We take the strain, bear the load
Build the bridges, sweep the roads
Build the houses that make the homes
Pay for others, but live alone
The singer could not have died at work, in war or at sea, else he would not have lived to write this song. Nor does he say whether he specifically has ever made his living at a dangerous job such as construction, or been divorced or alienated from any children he might have had.
Now let’s skip to the next verse:
I never held my father’s hand
Took his side, made a stand
All my life I just ran & ran
He said “Son, you don’t understand.”
So is the singer implying that his parents divorced when he was a child? And how did that affect his relationship with his father? Did his mother teach him to hate (or be afraid of) his father? Does the singer, as an adult, wish his relationship with his dad could have been better?
Now let’s rewind to the verse that comes immediately after the one about Grandma & Grandpa’s relationship:
I used to think men had too much
Thought the world could use a woman’s touch
Was told the promise would be worth the trust
That we’d all be one or near enough
But that isn’t what happened…
The singer, like most of us guys, must have grown up being taught that girls were sugar & spice & everything nice, but after reaching adulthood saw that illusion shattered. Again, maybe the cycle of marriage & divorce repeated when his own marriage fell apart.
And now the pair of lines with which all verses end:
All I see
Is the hatred of women for men like me
“Hatred of women for men like me.” Again he scarcely says which specific women showed hatred toward him, as opposed to other men or the male gender in general. Does writing one gender off as harboring hatred toward the other really advance the goals of either one, or of the society in which they live?
A song like that could negate any efforts by a website or its radio show to give a voice to men who for one reason or more feel frustrated by their interactions with women, law enforcement, family courts &/or criminal courts. We should be fighting feminism (the ideology), not women (the biological demographic)! A song like that could reduce the MRM to merely one side of a coin on whose other side feminism rests. Feminism & Men’s Rights would merely be mirror images of each other.
A man going his own way does not need an ideology to guide him in whatever “his own way” might be. He would do well to be aware of issues like paternity fraud & false rape accusations, but in the long run, affiliating himself with a movement might do him more harm than good. I have done all I can to help the MRM bring to light the issues we face as men. I wish them well, but shall follow them no more.
As always, Caveat andro.